Deep Thoughts

• TV: If you eat like commercials tell you to, you'll never look like the actors on the shows.
• Laws: Prostitutes have sex for money, and they're breaking the law. Porn stars also have sex for money, but they're not breaking the law. How come?
• Language: A diuretic makes you pee. An emetic makes you throw up. So what makes you take a dump? A laxative. I don't get it.